More Doom!

[bazza1970]

It is with deep sadness that I report another nail in the coffin of beautiful Kalkan. To the little Englanders and the clique who live or reside there for part of the year, this news will be very welcome, I'm sure, but to true tourists who love the exclusivity and Turkishness of Kalkan, it is one more reason why the resort will soon be a no-go area in a few years for those of a discerning nature and upscale tastes.

I have learned that in an exchange deal with, of all places, Scarborough, Kalkan harbour is to be home to, wait for it..........a whelk and winkle stall!! I sincerely hope that the stall has a) great refrigeration due to the 45C heat of the high season and b) good insurance for the number of tourists who will surely come down with some awful tummy bug eating whelks and winkles, food items more commonly found in the cold shore waters of Great Britain that have been air-freighted via Dalaman, stuck on a van or Dolmus and ferried directly to Kalkan harbour, might start a rush at the soon to be opened hospital in Kas!

Although I expect many sarcy retorts from forum members dedicated to the pursuit of making Kalkan a hot version of Blackpool, I believe that selling English seaside delights in Kalkan is not only ridiculous and anathema, it will also be a commercial non starter.

The (for now) sophisticated palates of British tourists who visit Kalkan will surely baulk at the prospect of eating warm, slimy sea snails in the dire heat of the harbour's mid-day sun and while I appreciate the novelty will see a few of the die hard "kiss-me-quick" brigade who hanker after home-style food wherever they travel in the world eat a punnet or two, can you honestly imagine the commercial success of such a venture? Next we'll be selling candy floss, Kalkan rock, naughty 'Wish you were here' postcards and pie mash & liquor under food stalls canopied with the red, white and blue bunting of Blighty's famous Union Jack!

The thought of another element of English life encroaching on the Turkishness of Kalkan really hurts and although I fully expect nothing less than wholesale whelk and winkle support as well as derision and shouts of, "well dont come here then," from some blinkered forum members, there must be some of you out there with similar thoughts to my own - that this once beautiful town has enough of the UK about it without encouraging more seaside mentality to manifest itself on the picturesque and peaceful lanes. What next, salt and vinegar chips and pies next door to the bingo hall!? I think the many wonderful, quality fish restaurants might have something to say about cheap, tacky Brit stalls selling polystyrene mugs of vinegar soaked Gastropods! I thank you!

Linkback: https://www.enjoykalkan.com/forum/index.php?topic=10808.0

[Helshe]

APRIL FOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Cuddles]

Give it up Bazza, you've become boring.

There is nothing you can do to stop the changes and, like it or not, the Turkish business people in Kalkan will do whatever they can to make money from the tourists.

[Wendy]

April fool.

[Mayday1]

Forget " April " fool Bazza........just fool !!

I love whelks
I love candy floss
I love naughty Kalkan postcards
I love Kalkan rock
...........i am looking forward to wearing my knotted hankerchief on Patara beach too.

[pw]

Hopefully your tattooed beer belly won't get too burnt.......

[bazza1970]

As the former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher once said when be heckled by Parliament when they wanted her out, "carry on, carry one. I'm enjoying this!"

So, give it your worst children.

[lilly]

Gosh!
Bazza, how awful, whelks! Whelks! Who told you about this? Thank you for letting us know. 

[Bee]

 

Can't beleive it's the 1st of April already!

[kalkan4eva]

Oh dear....some people have taken this seriously. You need to come clean, Bazza, lest we have a "Stop the Whelk" campaign on our hands
Nine weeks tomorrow I'll be in Kalkan, on a winkle hunt, daresay I won't find any

[bazza1970]

Unbelievable. It's April the first and I put a false post on (albeit making it sound genuine) and everyone and their mother comes bleating on - having a go at Bazza, intimating that I am the April Fool. I'm afraid the boot is on the other foot dear people. God bless you all and enjoy the rest of Fool's Day! You have been well and truly had, done up like a kipper (or a whelk) and wound up more than a clockwork train! 

[Blue Lizard]

Original posted on KTLN..far better and more amusing without turning into a rant

[Mayday1]

PW

Thanks for your concern for me on Patara beach.Seriously though,there is really no need to worry.My 6 pack ( no beer belly or tattoo in sight ) will be well covered up by my string vest

[pw]

PW

Thanks for your concern for me on Patara beach.Seriously though,there is really no need to worry.My 6 pack ( no beer belly or tattoo in sight ) will be well covered up by my string vest

and as long as you've got your socks and sandals on you wont burn your feet....

[pw]

Unbelievable. It's April the first and I put a false post on (albeit making it sound genuine) and everyone and their mother comes bleating on - having a go at Bazza, intimating that I am the April Fool. I'm afraid the boot is on the other foot dear people. God bless you all and enjoy the rest of Fool's Day! You have been well and truly had, done up like a kipper (or a whelk) and wound up more than a clockwork train! 

just not funny Bazza lad......

[bazza1970]

Busy watching Corrie..................

[hobbo]

Original posted on KTLN..far better and more amusing without turning into a rant

+1

[bazza1970]

Must try harder

[onelove]

Be honest bazza. You were the one that was 'Had' ........by KTLN..... 

Also like others 'ave said.....your post (rant ) was just Not funny either .....must try harder 

[Mayday1]

Still bazza,you will be going back to school next week,so get your head down,and study how to be funnier,but for the time being,your mid term report says..........This boy must try much harder !!