A Tale of Two Cows

[Paradise Joe]

A Tale of Two Cows

SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.
 
COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
 
FASCISM: You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
 
BUREAUCRATISM: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World Wide .

A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are Mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don''t know where they are. You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
 
A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belongs to you. You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity,

A TURKISH CORPORATION: ?

Linkback: https://www.enjoykalkan.com/forum/index.php?topic=2422.0

[Blue Lizard]

eat them!!

[kalkan4eva]

....has two cows which are carried on a scooter along with the wife, a couple of kids and some groceries from the market 

[JACQUIVIVA]

Quotation

The friendly cow all red and white

I love with all my heart

She gives me cream with all her might

To eat with apple-tart

Robert Louis Stevenson

P.S You don,t see many cows in Turkey where do they get those steaks ?

Sunny in Nottingham today wish i was in Kalkan

[Blue Lizard]

is sunny a cow?

[JACQUIVIVA]

Could be Blue Lizard she and her friend are deciding which goverment or country would be best untill then they are underclover.

My bets on India.

[fidimax]

Has anyone heard the tale of the two cows stood in a field ?

[fidimax]

The brown one says to the black one "did you hear about this mad cow thing ?"
the black one replies"wont effect me,Im a duck !"

[kalkan4eva]

...I hear the sound of cracking ribs Fidimax....

[fidimax]

Oh yes,silly tale,but always makes me chuckle,OOPS thats another rib gone !


                                                 

[helen1]

Thanks everyone who contributed to the above thread it had me in stitches after a VERY stressful day at school.